bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
