I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
