I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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