Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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