how can u be prego again
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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