Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
