it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I just want nice things and good sex
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
