if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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