Please, let me fuck your mom
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
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We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
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Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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