belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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