Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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