Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize