Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
