Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Randomize
