So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
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