I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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