I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
