no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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