happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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