I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Randomize
