Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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