he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Randomize
