WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
