My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
