I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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