remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize