Moan for me like Helen Keller
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
he was CRYING into my vagina
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
