I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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