girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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