Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
