I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
