The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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