Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
