I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Tornado booty call.. dedication
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
