Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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