I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
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