I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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