just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I supernannyed him into submission
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
