: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
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