I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
