I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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