dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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