I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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