so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
