He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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