This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
