I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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