i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
