He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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