god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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