there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
im six kinds of drunk right now
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
